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|like2learn||Posted - 11 September 2005 16:48
My dad has some sort of temper problem. He always shouts even when he is explaining something and it gets me annoyed. Then we always end up in an argument, he can never admit he is wrong and I can never bring myself to saying sorry. He always says how i have no respect for him and how he does loads for me and that's how I treat him. It just makes me really upset and I cry, I really want to try and respect him but it is really hard for me because he doesnt show respect back. I always say it works both ways but he just says "i've tried" and I dont think he has. He says too that once he's dead (chas v'shalom) I will realise that I had a good father and I heard him say to my mum that he will be gonig into his grave knowing i dont love him.
I do love him. and this made me so upset. i just find it hard to say i love you to my dad, but can always say it to my mum. its because he doesnt show me respect as much or give me as much attention, hes too busy in his own stuff and doesnt really care what im up to. i really want to show respect and hug him and stuff, but I find it hard and now I feel really upset and guilty. he always says how "it says in the torah to repsect your parents" but he doesnt even follow the torah (im baal teshuva) and this makes me feel even moer guilty and upset, and i cant stop crying. Please help!
|neshama||Posted - 27 September 2005 1:10
Maybe you can do physical and tangible things for him, as favors. Whether they're needed or not. Or buy things that he likes- cheap things- and give them to him for no special reson. (or make up a reason). This can accomlish 2 things: First- it'll show him you care about him, and think about him, and it's easier to show someone you love them than to say it. There's no doubt that he'll feel it.#2 giving to someone causes love. The more you give to him (without conditions) the more you'll get to love him. You might even be able to tell him that one day.
hatzlacha- please lemme know what happens.
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