Anything about JUDAISM
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sometimeroundmidnight Posted - 22 September 2011 3:34
basically theres this guy i like,im skipping eleventh and im going into twelvth,hes entering his first year of yeshivah in israel. at first we decided not to get involved because it would be hard for both of us if he left. we were stupid and did get involved. now hes leaving in a week and i cant get my mind off him and i cry all day thinking about him leaving. we spoke a bit about dating during our first/second year of college and i have a feeling that it may not happen. now hes harder to reach and when i text him he wont answer for hours if he does at all even though he talks about wanting to hang out. he said many times that hes not bringing a laptop with him to israel because he doesnt want to get swept up in the social scene here and not grow as much as he otherwise could. i understand that ,yet ive invested so much in thjis relationship and now im scared hes just going to leave me and move on with his life in one week. he has said that i am the type of girl hed like to marry...but idk what to do.any help?please let it be fast before he leaves(the twentyeighth of august) .also my mom wants to send me out of town for this last week because shes scared he will break my heart if i stay and interct with him more.im scared that he already broke it
soulrebel Posted - 07 October 2011 2:53
TIME. This is going to take TIME.

First....get everyone you know who knows and wasn't all disapproving about it. Talk to them, as much as you need to. Eat chocolate. Don't respond to his texts/inboxes/emails right away- wait at least 8 hours in between. He should NOT have a mental image of you pining away for him at some screen.

Second....when you feel a bit better...get a time-consuming thing to do. Even if it's a job that's DEAD BORING, like knitting doilies or some other equally useless time waster. You can still communicate with him, but he should do most of it. You are, after all, a busy person.

Thirdly...a bit later....you need to put a barrier around your heart. Bit by bit, a little every day, try to get used to the idea that he probably isn't "The One". This is the hardest part, and I say this until I'm blue in the face, But GUYS USUALLY go to Israel and come back too frum for their exes. Try to accept that he may dump you and feel self righteous about it, and feel patronizingly towards you. Harden your heart so he won't see you cry- cuz yeah, even with all of your doily-knitting and holding back, you will still care. A lot.

Fourth....he will most likely return from Israel. You WILL see him at some point. WHEN, NOT IF, you see him, if you still care, you must maintain THIS EXACT EMOTIONAL BALANCE: prepared not to care, prepared to fall back in love


I know it sounds cold. But I've seen this work

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