Anything about JUDAISM
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malkayehudia Posted - 07 July 2011 23:44
I am becoming religious and recently I started dressing tzniut all the time. I have a sister who is close to my age and she is obssesed with fashion and she looks down on me for only wearing long skirts and long sleeved shirts. I make every effort that I can to look pretty but no matter what I do she always criticizes the way I dress and she thinks I am crazy and brainwashed for not wearing shorter and more open stuff. She really has lowered my self esteem because we are really close to eachother. If any of you ever went through something like this or have any advice for how I should deal with it please comment on this.
taon Posted - 17 July 2011 3:13
Ask why shorter and open is better, or whats wrong with how you dress. And keep asking "why" until you hit the truth.

Read Modesty: An Adornment for Life by Rabbi Pesach Eliyahu Falk for chizuk and tips

SaraK Posted - 21 July 2011 23:01

It must really suck when your sister whom you're close to doesn't respect your standards of Tznius. I never dealt with such a situation before, but I think it's time for you to have a little talk with your sis about this. Explain to her why you choose to dress this way, and how her comments hurt you.

Hopefully, your sister will make an effort to be more sensitive (hey, who knows, maybe even respectful...!) to your new dress code. I hope things work out between the two of you, cuz sisters are the best friends and nothing should ever come between you two!!!!

Btw, check out Gila Manolson's "Inside Outside". It is THE best book ever written on Tznius. I never met a girl who read it and didn't love it.

Hope this helps!

Shopaholic7 Posted - 27 July 2011 23:25
wen ur sister grows she mite understand & if not wat u r doing is 100% rite u hav never made a better idea.
ppl would look up 2 u haslocho rabo
bananahannah23 Posted - 27 July 2011 23:25
Hey...I've had similar experiences, with a sister and some friends. I'm sorry--that's a tough situation you've got.

My advice to you:

When she says something that bothers you, let her know--and try to talk about the ideas and feelings that are behind it. Ask her for respect--let her know how much her comments affect you, and how much her respectful support will mean to you.

Tznius is difficult because it is about your relationship with yourself, your relationship with Hashem, and your relationship with others. Succeeding in tznius means that you can balance and understand all three. Seems like you're doing well...yasher koach!

Good luck.

EstherGallwitz Posted - 27 July 2011 23:25
Some of my family are Jewish and some aren't and I dress Tzniut too. I started recently. Some of my relatives on the non-Jewish side tell me that it's ridiculous and look down on me for it. At least we can be happy that we found a style of modest Jewish dress habits that we like!!
Halakhic Man Posted - 02 August 2011 1:14
Do as Taon put it. You must realize the source of her ridicule is of ignorance. Ask her a question on what she thinks will happen to her in the afterlife, and so on.The first sif in Orach Chaim says to not be bothered by those who mock the service of G-D (for who are they?)
evryrosethorns Posted - 08 August 2011 0:53
I hate when sisters do that. why does she bother you so much about it? just tell her that you dress the you feel is right,if she has a problem with it deal with it. I guess the only way to help her dress modestly is by being an example.I mean that how i learned, from people i respect. the fashion thing is just a faze-hopefully

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