Anything about JUDAISM
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freespirited1 Posted - 12 August 2009 18:07
So many things are hard for me right now that I don't even know where to start.
1. My mother was sick for two years and died not long ago. My best friend's father passed away soon after her. What on earth is going on here????
2. I have some weird medical issues that seem small but I think they're really connected somehow. No doctor believes me and most of my friends and people I work with are beginning to think I'm crazy. I'm not a hypochondriac, and I know what I'm talking about; I'm definitely right, but HOW ON EARTH DO I MAKE PEOPLE LISTEN TO ME???
3. I think my father's dating (he won't admit it for sure), but I don't want him to yet. I want him to be happy, and to eventually get remarried, but every time I bring it up with him, he tells me that I should stay out of it, and that it's his decision, not mine.
4. My father and I don't get along in general, and he recently made up all these crazy and very strict rules. He's driving me up the wall, and even though I've resisted therapy this far, I'm afraid that I'll have to go, just because of the way he's treating me!
5. On top of my issues with my father, I really haven't been getting along with my sister lately. We fight sometimes, and then go back to being nice to each-other, but it doesn't really last for long.
6. I have a...unique and special gift from Hashem. I would sound absolutely crazy if I posted it here, but check out the thread entitled "empath" to get an idea of what I'm talking about (no, I'm not an empath. It's something much more crazy-sounding and disturbing, but it's in that supernatural field...).
7. I am very responsible. I have always been, but lately, I have a LOT more responsibilities on my head, with no hope of them letting up (because of my mother's petirah, and I'm the one responsible for everything, because I'm the only one who's really responsible and/or capable in my family). And it's not fair that I should have to be treated like a child even though I have every single responsibility of a regular adult and then some...

If you have ANY advice in ANY of these areas, please please post them!
(And if you have the names of any open-minded Rabbanim that live in America, please post their names and contact information.

sandythedog Posted - 22 September 2009 13:57
Okay, in terms of people dying at the same time, that has happened b4, don't ask me why, that's the way it is meant to be.

In terms of little illnesses having something to do with one another, in the physical sense, it is possible;one things affects another. Speak to a homeopathic doctor and he might be able to lead you in the right direction. I know people very into it, and it works!! NO JOKE.
In the spiritual sense, they could be connected. One may be being punished or they are being encouraged to realize what they need to change. Life's challenges don't only occur because of punishment they can often occur to encourage growth and change. Think about what is happening to you and what message it gives you. If you feel 'it is telling me to have more emunah' then concentrate on doing that. It's a message for us, not just a 'punishment' as we may view it.

taon Posted - 24 September 2009 15:35
<<1. My mother was sick for two years and died not long ago. My best friend's father passed away soon after her. What on earth is going on here????>>
Obviously, whenever there's a tragedy we are supposed to search ourselves. Rabbi Miller zt"l said, after several Gedolim passed away around the same time, that he didn't know what significance it had, if any. But that we should be reminded how important life is, and how mcuh we need more Gedolim. (Rav Miller passed away around the time Rav Shach and Rav Pam did, If I remember correctly. At least it felt that way.)So i guess it could be a reminder of the importance of good parents, and family. It may also be something you notice becuase it's close to you.

<<2. I have some weird medical issues that seem small but I think they're really connected somehow. No doctor believes me and most of my friends and people I work with are beginning to think I'm crazy. I'm not a hypochondriac, and I know what I'm talking about; I'm definitely right, but HOW ON EARTH DO I MAKE PEOPLE LISTEN TO ME???>>
a. find concrete evidence b. talk to other people, other doctors or just people. Maybe describe the symptoms here, maybe others have had them. c find the spiritual connection, meaning, why Hashem is causing this.

<<6. I have a...unique and special gift from Hashem. I would sound absolutely crazy if I posted it here, but check out the thread entitled "empath" to get an idea of what I'm talking about (no, I'm not an empath. It's something much more crazy-sounding and disturbing, but it's in that supernatural field...).>>
supernatural has negative and goyish connotations. Like, people dont call neshamos supernatural. It's something Hashem gave you. And i can guarantee you wont be considered crazy. First of all, there would be some mention of something related to it in Torah. Second, many of us im sure have known stranger. thirdly, it seems to me that we never have just one poster saying something. There are almost always at least two posting about the same thing, even if they haven't seen each other's postings. So you probably are not alone.

<<7. I am very responsible. I have always been, but lately, I have a LOT more responsibilities on my head, with no hope of them letting up (because of my mother's petirah, and I'm the one responsible for everything, because I'm the only one who's really responsible and/or capable in my family). And it's not fair that I should have to be treated like a child even though I have every single responsibility of a regular adult and then some...>>
No one has to know what you do. So put on a facade of being who people think you are, and act like you should be. See if you can combine two jobs into one or something. And you can always ask for help, remember.

May the Geulah have come before this post goes up.

questions? go here:

www.frumteens.com/forum.php?forum_id=65

josh1 Posted - 16 November 2009 22:32
Life can be tough.

1. Im really sorry to hear about your mother. Im sure she gets nachas from you all the time. We cannot understand these things, only once we are in the next world we will understand.
2. As long as the issues are small and the doctors dont think its necessary to do anything about it, maybe you can stop worrying and leave them alone for now?
3. Your father may be lonely, and at the end of the day he is doing what he thinks is the best, Im sure he doesnt want to hurt you.
4. How many teenagers (or even those in their twenties) get along with their parents all the time? You are not alone
5. Same goes with siblings. Sounds like anyone I know.
6. I searched for "empath" but couldnt find it...whats the hardship involved?
7. You are right, maybe you shouldnt be treated as a child. Sometimes its hard for adults to see that some children are more responsible than adults are. Obviously you are also a special girl.

Sorry for making this so formal, I just wanted to comment on each of your comments.
I also didnt really give any advice, but tried to put some new perspective on things. I hope it helps at least a drop.

Good luck!

Jacobeli Posted - 28 December 2009 1:33
wasnt goignt o post but figuired i just read it y not..Just want to give you my blessing everything works out and again sorry to hear about your motherlike someone said im sure shes shepping nachas...We just have to do whats right ..things are not always easy but good tgings dont come easy and we muct do our best and realize Hashem loves us...We also dont see the good oin things but not just everything that happens is for as reason,,.it is AlSO good!
Goodluck with everything..just about your sister.be as nice as you can at all times to her and see what happens...work together instead of apart..im sure you are bioth going through hard times...stcik together and make it easier - also another thing to rememebr is that Hashem wont give you a test you cant pass which means Hashem feels you are extremly stong! keep it up! Klal Yisroel needs people like you!

I hope I was helpful!
All the best!

Jacobeli Posted - 18 March 2010 0:56
wasnt goignt o post but figuired i just read it y not..Just want to give you my blessing everything works out and again sorry to hear about your motherlike someone said im sure shes shepping nachas...We just have to do whats right ..things are not always easy but good tgings dont come easy and we muct do our best and realize Hashem loves us...We also dont see the good oin things but not just everything that happens is for as reason,,.it is AlSO good!
Goodluck with everything..just about your sister.be as nice as you can at all times to her and see what happens...work together instead of apart..im sure you are bioth going through hard times...stcik together and make it easier - also another thing to rememebr is that Hashem wont give you a test you cant pass which means Hashem feels you are extremly stong! keep it up! Klal Yisroel needs people like you!

I hope I was helpful!
All the best!

257abcd Posted - 22 November 2010 3:14
empath, how old are you? just to figure out what kind of advice to give...
surviver2 Posted - 12 January 2011 2:22
hay when reading your post i saw some of my issues i also lost mother and father was over controlling i had a bunch of weird medical small issues that the doctor was clueless every one called me a hypochondriac but then i left home and all my medical issues went away i realized they all came from stress bec when i had family issues i got sick again im not judging but your life sounds stressful that might be the reason for all your illness hatzlacha and your not a hypochondriac

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